“No pain no gain.”
“Life is hard.”
“No one ever said life is fair.”
“Good things come to those who wait.”
“You have to pay your dues.”
“Children are meant to be seen and not heard.”
“Speak only when spoken to.”
“Finish your plate. There are starving people in the world.”
Do you recognize any of these? Have you ever thought one of them or even said it out loud to others?
Do you feel one or more of those and others, oh, so many others, are deeply engraved in how you live your life, how they drive your behavior on an unconscious level?
Those beliefs are limiting. You have learned them from people who probably had all the good intentions for you. Yet all those beliefs have to offer in the long run is conditioned fear. We often don't even notice anymore, that those and other beliefs are running our behavior and how we do life. We just feel invisibly blocked, insecure and fearful.
How to free yourself from limiting beliefs seems to be difficult, right? Because: "I can't change. Change is difficult and takes years" or "What if I fail?", "What if I will be rejected if I really do what I want?", "I am not supposed to want anything anyway. It is egocentric."
And so you end up doing and thinking things along the lines of "I have to..." and "I should/shouldn't...".
The first step in changing anything is becoming aware of the thought, the belief that drives my actions (I believe :)).
And so you might notice, that when you think you have to or should do something you are living in the belief of someone else. So when you catch yourself doing your "should"-ings, one simple question can bring you out of it:
According to who?
According to what?
When you feel you are stopping yourself to do something you would rather do, than you end up doing, ask yourself:
- What belief is underneath? What was I really thinking, that stopped me/blocked me?
- Do I believe this is actually true?
-What fear did I develop on top of that belief/thought?
- Could I see how it limited me so far in my life?
- What would I rather believe?
- How would that new belief serve me?
-How would I feel then?
- What steps could I take from here to feel more happy?
Really take some time to think those questions through, when you become aware of a mental, inner block. Yes, write it all down, play with different beliefs and thoughts. You don't have to take any of those on. So don't be afraid.
Actually just for the fun part of it. Make a list with all kinds of limiting beliefs. Some of them even sound funny, like: "Money doesn't grow on a tree." Dare to squeeze the poison out of them. And hey, why not?
Sometimes only this already has the power to untie the knot and clear your head to make space for new ideas, that are truly yours.